Texte — THE LADY OF THE LAMB (2023)

SMALL DEFECTS

As we left the diner and entered the night
I saw the freckles on your arm through the 24 hour fluorescent light
Reflected a body of stars in the sky
I kept it to myself; I was overloaded
But in the morning light as I watched your sleeping body
I came to understand

How we started as a folder that turns into a base
For a short time in the vibrant world of a woman
That when fully realized - a slippery sobbing sculpture -
Little bugs mimicking the stars will flourish
And the belief that ours could exist a few light years away, a few light years away
It's enough to make me weak
That this world brought me to you now and didn't wait

'Cause that's all I wanna do, love you
To experience together how we hum
How crystallized, how calcified
How fascinating, how small
To share the cosmic joke
To fall a thousand floors and laugh 'till we're sore
Taking and classifying the weird things we do

Baby you got little flaws like me
You try to be hard but I know you're soft
I thought you were hard until you stopped me
to pluck this tiny white flower from the earth
Baby I got little flaws like you
I'm stubborn and cool and also hot headed
When I missed six pitches in the batting cage
I threw my bat in a fit of anger
But it's all I wanna do

In the dark where we project Varda films on the wall
In the red light where we kissed under the golden arch
On the town square where we looked through the binoculars
Jupiter's Shine
Im Templehof Park, wo
Tuck our jeans into our socks and stroll through the pastel pink wheat fields
Make your way through pastel pink wheat fields

'Cause that's all I wanna do, love you
to see together how clumsy we are
as if crystallized, as if calcified
how fascinating, how small
to share the cosmic joke
Fall down a thousand floors and laugh until you're sore
record and classify the strange things we do

DEEP LOVE

I'm not convinced that we should fight for downtown. I think we should collectively neglect it, let the ivy and weeds grow and gather in a few hundred years or so, because I'm not convinced we should exist, man, I didn't ask for it that bad one day, so bitterly being over admitting lack of gratitude, I know... but seeing this faded crop of my fifteen year old mother on a bike, smiling at the local paper and looking like my sister, makes me feel filled with this depth of love when I'm with my loved one together and she comes out of the shower and pulls her messy hair really hard, I ask her to come over and sit on the bed. I make a fist under the roots and untie those knots without pulling out another She takes the comb to kiss my open palm and I'm entangled in that deep love as I pass my neighbor and he with his two unkempt dogs standing on the front steps and cooing their names his wife comes out to join him and they cooing it's names in unison they kiss those dirty little noses d watch from the sidewalk as they live in all this love passed through a pure scene in someone else's life goes, gives my life meaning, to go through a good scene in someone else's life, fills my cup of lights pouring fire my love, give all my love, my deep love, give all your love , your love

ALSO IN THE SHIVER

We bathed in blood moons in Berlin, we kissed in cathedrals, from Montreal to Madrid In Fallingwater we brushed our skin in bed The Masaya volcano paints our faces red Now the landscape in your eyes is a desert of defeat I want to stay , but I will turn to go
Let's let go of everything we shared tonight, force a deep sleep and pretend we don't care, I hate to play us off against yesterday...
I think what can't be close must be far. 'Cause the past will kill the present if I let it. The past will kill the present if I let it. The past will kill the present if I let it. I dream in colors dripping from every ruin we'll never lose ourselves in
If I remain obsessed with coloring my memories with a palette more vibrant than the existing corner, these rich rains could never wash over the imprint of one hand on the steering wheel and the other on my neck
if i ever forget how much love there is i just obsess over all the love i'm going to miss because the future will kill the present if i let it
the future kills the present if i let the future kills the present if every head is a world, i don't want to be a destroyer of all the pure things in me if i run from a day that hasn't yet bare its teeth me see my one moment falling apart, falling apart When every head is a world I don't want to be a destroyer of all the pure things in me
As I crawl toward a night I'm sure was golden and bright (even in the trembling, I feel a growing stillness) It takes a conscious effort to clear that head
My brain is a constant rain in its own shelter, but there's a parade in that fear, there's a symphony that sways in the downpour, and it eventually plays me to sleep every night until my morning.
and I can't ignore the tender heart in my chest and the radiance in its beats, oh the pain of owning such tenderness, but what is it worth owning? when even in the trembling I feel a stillness growing

UNTITLED SOUL

O Creator, will you not soothe my weary soul
You're so scared, you're so alone
I can feel fate weaving its golden thread
alone golden and shiny
all my melancholy on the loom

oh lover, won't you hold me in your hands
I'm a little worried, I'm all I have
I want to be held, I want to be good
I don't want to die, I want to be understood
all my sadness, all my shame

oh mom won't you decipher my dream:
I took the baby from her arms to dry her little tears
and when i brushed the hair out of her eyes, i saw that she was me
and you cooed
"My eldest, won't you soothe your old soul—
You're so scared, you're so alone"

oh lover, won't you hold me in your hands
I'm a little worried, I'm all I have
I want to be good and I want to be loved
I want to live, do you understand?

I fight the villain in my head
want the crown want the title of my soul
I'll be ready to rot when I'm finally gone
where I can no longer be consoled

oh my death you won't spare me today
today i will feel the sun, today i will swim in the lake
I'll do something right if you let me wake up today

make something real
soothe my soul
Take all my blues
everything i have
soothe my soul

STRANGE MANEUVERS

A man holds a Bible above his head
Your blood flows with a shit-eating smile
He's just waiting to be noticed
Teenagers buy fruit on the corner
the juices run down the middle fingers
They just want to be scrutinized
As I walk through the cathedral doors
It's beautiful inside whether you're born again or not

waiting in the wings
Wild thoughts are angry things
The mind thinks of itself
how impressive
Ripe rotten
the roughness smoothes
Time makes strange maneuvers
the spectacle, so theatrical:
The person fucks non-stop
how incessant, how unnerving,
the sky shines, we curse

I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore
I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore
I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore
I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore

after wading in my paddling pool brain all day
My last resort is a ticket to a matinee
but my attention is too broken to pay -
I can't stop repeating my mistakes over and over again

waiting in the wings
Wild thoughts are angry things
The mind thinks of itself
how impressive
Ripe rotten
the roughness smoothes
Time makes strange maneuvers
how incessant, how unnerving,
the sky shines, we curse

I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore
I don't want to be afraid of myself anymore

Kurt called this morning just to remind me I'm fine.
Last night he read me a long list of words to keep me busy
and it worked Kurtie Bear -
You bathed my brain like a baby in the sink
Please stay with you like you stayed with me

I know the vibrating pain
if the tone of your desire
Your vein vibrates
like a taut cord being tightened
but your mind thinks of itself! - Honey, isn't that something else?

DICTATORSHIP

I knew by the width of your shoulders it was you
I saw you walking down the street with your back to me
Just a few years older
how strange to want to tell you everything and nothing at once

Wouldn't it be nice not to have any more time?
Flying kites in the background of the night
Until no sun shines its light through everything
Holy skin when heartbreak has no place
without a name for it

If we take our time
If we take our time
If we take our time
And throw it into oblivion
If we take our time
If we take our time
If we take our time
And throw it into oblivion

Wouldn't it be nice to hold your hand
In the snow and not feeling how cold everything is
'Cause the cold feels like a nameless kiss

YOUNG STUDENT

Aly, what's on your mind all the time?

Well, when I was five, my mother told me that one day we're all going to die.

It was a dinner at night of all things

left me with a bad taste in my mouth and a knack for existential twists

How that happened, you may be wondering, as the full moon seemed to squint and draw closer

Well, on a church stage in a paddling pool, she and my father were reborn

I was sitting next to my little sister in the audience and I didn't understand

They were my age then, the age I am

So I think I understand better now...

The fear, the fear of being alone

to die young or grow old without realizing it

the goal of your soul

With a milkshake in hand, my mother mentioned a second coming

that as believers we would be raised to a radiant kingdom in heaven

Well I couldn't imagine a place of light over the desert night

but as a passionate follower of my beautiful mother,

I put all my trust in her

You and I both in and out of fear of the future

We lean towards the sky and search for that answer

I can see a romance in reaching and a tenderness in believing

but mom, you didn't awaken a heavenly wish

just a wish to hold my life a little tighter

just a wish to hold my life a little tighter

PRAYER OF LOVE

The sight of the cleaned calf makes me cry
I cry when I see the calf being cleaned
And I love the street from our porch
I'm staring at the moon, I swear she's looking at me
and I will build my life into a sanctuary
never fail to bow to this sacred moment

The prayer of true love is the greatness of the universe -
I can feel it contracting like a calf's heart
and then I feel it stretch out with your head in my hands
You can squeeze the part you love in my palm when he is playing
And I'd tell you how I love you, but I won't compete with the music

And I could never describe the paradise I find in your eyes
but I believe I will rest there the day I die
So I'll try to be nice to me and you and my brother and my sisters and strangers and my friends
Now I'll leave you at the gate where Scandinavian heaven is a piece of pink meat and if you let me go
this harsh sun goes and sticks in my throat
And I choke back my tears, but I get no relief
'Cause my heart breaks with you and I have to carry this hollow body to a bed that's not mine
(although aside from the unrelenting horrors, I find I sleep fairly well)
I never hear a leak of what I tell myself
Even now I can say that I don't listen to myself
mmmmm
I wish my words could be my sustenance
I would like to take my own medicine other than pouring myself a cup of it
and i wish you were here and the love could last
I'm not sure if it can't, just pray for it
and that's really all, that's all, yeah
Baby you're all I want, all I really want, yeah
that's all i want all i really want yeah

JULY WAS WORLDWIDE

miss the sharp sweetness of this wood
July was soulful and dripping, July was mundane
Dipping my toes in a lazy rowboat on the lake
Your birthday boy somewhere in the country
When I was sure I was a misanthrope
Blaming strangers laughing out loud in the woods for my dissatisfaction
She went down to the water to watch the fireworks
but I wouldn't give myself the vision -
I lay in bed and listened to them
crack and bloom

I miss the pungent sweetness of this Woodford reserve
July was soulful and dripping, July was mundane
I lick my fingers to get all the icing off the cake
Your birthday boy somewhere in Maine
When I was sure I could convince you with my words
Holds the 'Portland Sun' overhead in a summer storm
I mostly invented it and fell in love with building
And she was finally able to say, so she wished me well
and as I gathered my clothes, another storm began to gather
and crack and bloom

Even in my hands it hurts to claim the confused and wounded little animal that I was
Baby I'm torn apart by all my attempts to change you
the same pathetic little animal that I was
It's an achievement to forgive me

I'm meant to understand my own mind
By taking it from your throat and start emptying it?
I should understand my own heart
how he sings my praises all day and I avoid him?
I should understand my own body
how do i go away to escape her?
I should understand my own soul
while I envy you for hovering over me?

and I wonder who will take care of my own love if not me
When I grow up in the lilies only to leave it in the weeds
I wonder who could save my own world if not me
On my morning where I bring it into being
I wonder who could save my own world if not me?

OH MY VIOLENCE

I used to think I needed to be torn in two, reach into you
be brought back better than me
I must have a rodent in my heart's bosom
When I'm longing for my own love
and I can't get warm?
I lose myself in loss

I lose myself

on television, where a sermon meets me like a half-detour
what is worse, the pastor curses under his breath –
he cannot find the passage to support the argument he is having with himself
and I see a torn page in your Bible
As I fall asleep, I look across the mountains at the motel painting
and my dream leaves me:
I'm falling from the top, but instead of you I'm calling out to myself

I lose myself in loss

I lose myself

In my waking life, where I can't get myself out of my head
clear enough to rip it out of him too
In an attempt to get back into myself without bringing you with me

...If I could see today in all its glory, I would feel humbled.
but the past has so much charisma, I feel like it's catching up
And I better walk so I don't get lost

In that scene where I called you guys names in the street
and you sent me back with such a kind look
it is impossible to describe beyond this confused mention
I bow my head in disbelief at how difficult the lesson is.

Now there is no greater challenge than taming my violence
live with it long enough to get rid of it
in the lake of pure intention, in the desert of forgiveness
I will show compassion
I pull you to me until we both fall asleep

Emily

I found an image

My first car in the falling snow

It feels like I just rode at low tide yesterday

And Isaac took a Polaroid of me pretending I was sinking

pressed against the glass, begging

I lost it but I'm looking

When we are young we could only see behind our fears where we are free

When we are alone we could only know that we grow in our silence

All portraits we collect

while we walked in the desert

we tried to look happy

to rewrite our New York City narratives

but Emily, we were totally discouraged

We took turns crying on the passenger side of America,

too cloudy to be enhanced by towering redwoods

When do we lose the old truths?

Are we born to bend our bodies?

How can we spend our lives searching outside of ourselves for the inner knowing of our oneness with the world?

Shervin, do you remember when my car finally stopped? We lugged our dirty clothes to the laundromat after dark and sauntered down Graham Avenue obsessing over singers we love. I thought I was so lonely, but now I know I never was

You were always the Jenny of my Watson Twins

I can't get the harmony right, but let's keep singing

No photo artifacts, but here's something better

When we are young we could only see behind our fears where we are free

When we are alone we could only know that in our silence we are still growing

(Emily if only we could see that we were free, oh Emily if only we knew we were still growing)

FOLDED SKY

I will protect your loneliness - watch first as we sleep soundly, you might fall on the balcony of the Masonic Hall to the sound of dancing chainsaws, let go of your head - I understand I'm baptized alone behind the lights - heaven leans towards hell. the sky itself – the tender warrior she sent to us I think when she saw that we were doing our best, trying to be good, trying to be kind, trying to stay true, I want you just agree, pale blue eyes, red light, hot, olympics 1865, the bright life of a fly, let go of your head I understand now, you are the blood in my song, watch me shed when it is sung, will it flow over everyone when you're gone? Oh God. My blood will fill the ditch My blood will bury the mountain But now it sits in my mouth just waiting for the tip of my tongue

WATCHTOWER

Leah, I got your letter, I was too scared to tell you, I was too scared to say a word or two, but my mind is still reading over your shoulder at Lake Michigan, are we 27? Leah, I got your letter

SAL

See all the lonely ones turning to the sky, the tower hunters made us search for the moon, and in that sky the horror of your absence made me tremble beside me beside you as the tears stained my face, you kiss everything but the salt, I suppose you didn't see - I can't blame you; As your tongue licked the whip all the salt seeped into it and you wouldn't believe some days I cried for you. I'm afraid I'm grieving already dead. In your arms I suddenly understand that my life built me ​​up for us. In your hands I am mine. you bring me to me The times I knew, now they bring me to you. I'm yours, I'm yours, you're mine, a kiss sucks the mud from my soul, the neon lights that fill your eyes over Coney Island, I could die tonight if I wasn't already dead, already in grief, when the tears stained my cheeks you kissed everything but the salt when your tongue licked the whip all the salt seeped in - am I mourning for you yet?

TAKE CARE

did we fuck Making our worlds so close from your skin to my bones, did I screw it up? to calm my mess your pennies in the palm of my hand shall we fuck? to make our world so right overnight. When I see you, when I look into my own eyes, how could I ever despise myself again?(Did I mess it up?)my bones on your skin

SHIPPED

time takes us the years waits with bated breath for the thong and the bait on the line finds a fish in the sea its teeth takes the cake and gives it to me. I heard from a little bird that you crushed your mother's bones please look me in the face don't be shameful oh lord oh please say say it's not because I'm immune I am immune to nobody, love is a luxury I can't afford. I call it by its name and you know it just comes out my door. Maybe I shouldn't hold on to it like that anymore. Your smoke makes a feather as it mutes my perfume and the color on the walls of your room makes a beautiful it makes a beautiful June and I never want to see you again I never want to see you again but I want to see you soon Because A heart can be as hard and sad as a single laugh in a funeral home and my argument is as meaningless as picking up coins in the snow and loneliness. She could be a whore. I put her to bed - I'm so sure she will Be there in the morning oh lord what could we be but the bracelets on your wrist? Oh Lord, what more could we be than the tangles in your hair? Look me in the face, you're no shame, oh Lord, please say it's not. Coins falling from his hand into the snow Coins falling from his hand into the snow

WE ARE NOBODY ELSE

I know I quartered our Exquisite Corpse - your lines were delicate and mine were morbid. I was just nervous that you weren't nice so I spilled blood on the knife because we were so scared switching places. Let's find some courage, baby, and put down the knives. our friends laugh I don't need anything anymore, I have everything I have the gold in your hair the sun in your hair and my hands in your hair overnight who gave us this fate? God's glory, God's anger terrify me! then relief floods my brain like biblical rain that we're ourselves - we're nobody else and we're making out in the woods behind the Brandenburg Gate while the sirens stop almost not knowing what to do, you and I you know almost not sure what to do when you see me watching you Frankie, I'll read to you from Salter in the Park while you illustrate your day for us Frankie, I'll read to you from Salter in the Park There's nothing sweeter than Your laugh my friend and there's nothing more I need. I have everything. I've got all the love I've ever known. And love is for you and love grows too heavenly not to build a shrine to praise the life that gifted us with this destiny? God's good glory God's great wrath God's heart of gold God's true love God's blue blood God's hot breath

KRATERSEE

let's be each other's presence let's go to the mountain by the lake let's undress let's swim and swim until the sun goes to sleep let's build a fire in the morning of such a deep flame let's get up where the world moves let's in walk the desert and let's sing for us this song runs through us this movement fills us with sunshine see this tree i will climb it i will pick a plum for you see this tree i will climb i will get you a plum

SEE CAVA

The supreme vena cava, the queen. Getting blood into the chamber, always into the chamber. And within you it moves in the same way, although you cannot feel it move - it moves there within you. I'm awake but I can't be found, I'm dreaming so far away. I sleep so soundly in your arms, but I can feel you leaving me even as you sit here, even as your coffee cup steams. I can feel the seams of your ribs will separate from the seams of my ribs; I already know how much television cannot comfort me in his absence. It's as if nothing ever existed, because everything will do exactly what it does. A bullet in the barrel of a gun, I'm hiding here for someone, someone. Stripes of canary yellow in your eyes. In that single bed I lie straight and narrow in your room on Long Island I tried to keep from sighing The rhythm of his speech made me believe he would go down with the wreckage of that old ship. Though our love is long dead, their ghosts will follow to the foot of my deathbed. I'm not a brother, I'm not a son. I don't have eggplant in my blood. I'm not a warrior or a king, but how I am when I sing, when I sing, sing, sing. While the vena cava - the most superior - always in her room, the queen brings blood to the chamber.

BILLION EYES

When gravity is a palm pressing down on your head like the devil has one paw dug into your shoulder and the other rubbing your back. But the kitchen in the new town has a window, yes, you can grow basil on the windowsill – maybe you can now call your neighbors by their names. Berries on the way are the sweetest way of life, and yet it seems to eat the flesh of the mountain. It's all grit and gristle I can't chew and swallow, I gnaw my way home. Clouds look very much like washed wool. I check the time on my phone but I'm still using my watch. I'm confused about how to connect to anything now. The kind of euphoria I like is when I can barely get on the train and the people sitting there smile at me because they know the feeling and for a millisecond we share a look like family, like us Inside jokes have how we can call each other with little nicknames. And I could tell you the story of how my great-grandmother's sister was canonized, how they exhumed her body after being buried for years, and found that she hadn't even gotten dirty, so they put her right back in the Vatican. I think of all the billions of eyes looking at something else at the same time and I get sick. Some days I can only see in my suitcase. It has everything I need plus a few superstitious things I might need too.” “Music calms the wild beast,” the pilot tells me, prompting me to sing, but now is not the time, me just want to fall into a pile of warm clothes . I just wanna be really, really calm, yeah It's June where you sleep, July where I land. I thought I saw you on the platform in Amsterdam and I almost missed my train and I felt so down that I jumped up to see all the warm smiles for me. I made my move and it made me so happy. I made my move and it made me forget everything. It forgot me, it forgot me, it forgot me, it forgot me, it forgot me, it forgot me, it forgot me, it made me forget everything.

VIOLETTE CLEMENTINE

You build a nest of yellow wool, you hope to God the yellow yard is soft enough to break your fall if you fall, if you fall. Blood is left behind and tears are held in hollow breasts while sweat is ignored but expended, our tears are sweat only kept secret and circulated through the pores. Keep your golden silence and important words, you are just a beautiful animal. Keep your golden silence and important words, you are just a beautiful animal.

HERETIC

Heretic, spit out your gum and bite your tongue - you will swallow your words, you will drink your milk, you will drop your gun. Heretics, when you show us your notes and rub your chin, you think you sure scored and that's it, you think you won. But the sun burns a hole in your head, the sun burns a hole in your head. You should stay in the shade, Copernicus, because the sun burns a hole in your head. Heretic, hysterical and historically ill-equipped to deal with what you say you see through your scope. Heretics what do you know about the stars we don't care cause we know in our hearts we're the only ones we're the favorites. And we don't care what you see in the sky, no, we don't care what you see in the sky. Galileo Galilee Galilae Galeli, we don't care what you see in the sky. Heretics, this isn't just house arrest. Don't spend the rest of your life taking back, taking back what you said. Because you and I are concentric - let's learn about black holes, turn off the TV. Let's think about the real builders of the pyramids, and then make a wish. 'Cause I know it's not a lie, I know it's not a lie We both saw the lights. If you're a heretic, then so am I. If you're a heretic, then so am I.

SUNDAY SHOES

You dragged your Sunday shoes when you jumped over the fence to chase your little sister's wolves, who ate dirt in the flower bed next to the house where your mother hung her head and pleaded with the Lord to make it like buttermilk pancakes for Sunday lunchtime to fill. The city was taken in oceans of praise with talk of how to get home and how we are all held in the arms of the most selfless love and the good we have all done is already written and we must all become a phenomenon. You took off your Sunday shoes when you jumped the fence to save your sister from those hungry wolves but you fell the wrong way, yeah you broke your leg and now the animals are turning their heads, they turn - no, now they come back, they come back. Take you to their cave and lick your bones, take you to their house and kiss all your bones, but don't be afraid to go with them, don't be afraid to be carried home. Heaven, it's gonna open, it's gonna swallow you whole, but don't worry my love, it's gonna feel so good in your soul, so good in your soul. You will be laid to rest by gentle hands and your mom and dad will miss you very much and you will become their favorite colour. And like dinosaurs discovered and buried, like dinosaurs confused and buried. Like the dinosaurs that were collected and laid to rest, so don't worry about your little sister now.

CUSPIR CUSPIR

Now I'm sitting on the train and peeling an orange. I look at a woman indifferently, she yawns and although this sight is commonplace, I am suddenly mesmerized and it hits me for the first time in my life at this moment how strange we all are, animal hearts pumping this animal, animal blood . Was I born wild? Have I been sleeping all this time dreaming of a life? Will I wake up and find myself in the middle of the woods growling on all fours? I could be cracked like a cartoon watermelon. Then you would see the solar system suspended in me. It is the same in you that pulsates and spins. We're just particles of spit spewed from the sky. We're covered in blood from long ago and I'm tired of starting wars so you see me as a warrior. Some old answers have since been dug up, still all those abandoned buildings they had to build and who were these architects who left their jobs? I kept my body on the bed but my head was floating towards the ceiling. Was I born wild? Have I been sleeping all this time dreaming of a life? Will I wake up and find I'm in the middle of the woods growling on all fours?

PENNY-LICKS

Maybe when we leave you can have our rooms like your own. And we can't seem to find a stable table, so we get our eggs and head out, and when we've paid your toll, you should give us a compliment like "Your eyes are beautiful" or "Your bone structure is quite exquisite." ' let's break our necks, we don't want to make a baby, let's break our necks, we weren't made to build this city, let's break our necks, we don't want to start a family, let's break our necks, for which we weren't made This town, let's stretch our necks.

DEAR DAUGHTER OF ARKANSAS

Take a dip in the water, take a dip in the water, dear daughter of Arkansas. You with the dark curls, you with the watercolor eyes. You who show all your teeth in every smile. He says, "I can always hear you sing, I want to hear you talk to me," while a stranger braids my hair in the street. And in your dreams we shoot snakes and while you were sleeping I must have been awake. I was talking with a cigarette and didn't have anything else to say but he should have been there anyway because I haven't sung a single song all day. How my love for you dies, how my love for you dies, how my love for you keeps dying, so strong and serious as a gun in the eye. My blood is full of swords, full of swords Your heart knows the Lord. Tie my hands and I hit my knees as I kneel, I kneel in the sea. At the bottom of the ocean I'll sink like a steel box full of weapons. On the back of the tide you'll rise like a ripe red apple, a ripe red apple. Take a dip in the filthy waters, dear daughter of Arkansas. Dive into dirty water, dear child, my true love. How my love for you dies, how my love for you keeps dying, dear child, my true love. Dear child, my true love, my true love.

LEITE DUDS

I'm an old song you used to know - you don't remember me at all and now they sing you lines that are new and you just wanna hear that chorus. We fell asleep on a milk carton; They transitioned into the club pads. I've never loved anyone more than you when I woke up that morning. You can try to relax or plan your attack when you return to Brooklyn, return to Brooklyn. You can close your eyes for a moment at a time, but in the dark they stay open, always open. My spine gets more sun when I'm not lying on my back with my brain dripping into my palm. I keep losing my wandering mind - he never takes the tube on time and now I'm trying to remember taking the stairs, tying my shoes and braiding my hair. I can't remember my own name or why I care. I wish the clouds would make up their minds so I could make up their minds now. We fell asleep on a box of milk showers; they merged with the club's cushions. I've never loved anyone more than you, more than you. Now I'm an old song you know You may not remember me all your life, but I hope you find joy in all the things you do and these songs we sing just for you.

DEZ

I so easily forgot to raise the litter box in Arizona and get the geckos and keep them as pets in a Halloween pumpkin. Their tails fell off their bodies and we screamed and ran from them. Keep playing, keep playing. My sister, she is with me even when we are apart. We walked along the water, flashlights blinking in the dark. Climb the laundry pole in the tomato garden, spy on the swimming neighbors. Laughing laughing I met my best friend that night in Maine, talked until 7am and realized we were both terrified of the idea of ​​having our brains in a whale body in the depths of the ocean where the light couldn't reach and I loved him immediately. I knew we'd keep talking, talking, on this drive down the winding mountain roads from Hudson to Vermont in the first snow of the season. The guys who slept in the back of the car - we sang every word of the songs in the front that helped us to become who we are. Sing, sing, my mother, my mother, she keeps a diary of her childhood memories They come back. My favorite is the story she tells of seeing an eagle with a fish in its mouth. She was ten and wrote it down. There's a sweetness within us that lives far beyond the dust in our eyes when our eyes finally close.

DRUMS

I was breathing my last when the plane crashed. I don't think I could even let it go. And I don't know if you've noticed, I don't know if you've noticed, but there's a drought around here. There is no water in the well. The dry season The dry season. Don't let your demons take you to the laundromat. Correct your posture while calling your mom. Make a drawing - it will take longer. A body is sacred when it's naked, so go ahead and let it be a bible to another. Blood is your compass, let it wander. Now I return to my first goal, a sharp breath below the surface where the lungs collapse like a rupture and the pulse stops racing until I become as sweet as nothing, I'm nothing now, just nothing now, I am now nothing, now nothing nothing now nothing I'm nothing. I called your name from the plane, but it didn't matter: you were at home baking a birthday cake, breaking an egg into the batter. You had some dough, some dough on your face

ATLAS

Funny how a good thing opens your eyes, makes you feel the branches, leads you to the pines. Still funny how passion shuts you up 'cause it makes you a dead motherfucker. Darling, but I know where I'm from; I have the key to this chest. Darling, but I know where I'm going; I have a body for this bed and I dress like eyes in an atlas. Shotgun orchestra, the needle bends as it turns. And we have skin like we were born to swim past our scalps. And I want, I want to swim with you I want to swim the length, swim the length, swim the length of this life with you. I'll undress like eyes in an atlas. I'll make myself a map, I'll be there in your eyes, I won't make it difficult for myself to find you. I will be a target with a firm and strong heart; a ready target for your arrow, my dear. I know where I'm from

HAIR ON THE FERRIS WHEEL

Take me by the arm to the altar, take me by the collar to the cliff, take me by the waist to the water, take me by the hair to the ferris wheel, take me by the wrist to the river, take me by the braid river to my grave. Love is selfish, love goes tick-toc-tic, love knows Jesus, apples and oranges. It's a zoo in your room when you want to part your lips and kiss like you don't exist when the dawn breaks. & all I want to do this afternoon is pull the mattress up to the ceiling: muffled sounds in the ears of the plane next to you. We'll crawl on top of each other like crows on a carcass, like ants on a crumb, starving just for the taste of tongues. Love is selfish, love goes tick-toc-tic, love knows Jesus, apples and oranges. Take me by the arm to the altar, take me by the collar to the cliff, take me by the waist to the water, take me by the hair to the ferris wheel, take me by the wrist to the river, take me by the braid river to my grave.

AUBERGINE

Well I bled blue blood on my back last night I was alone. Eggplant leaves on my bed now, oh no And your blue eyes lie like an atlas in these caves, yes, your blue eyes cry map water when you're sorry, oh, I'm sorry. You with the neck that holds my gaze, you with the tongue that speaks my name, you with the arms that keep me at a distance, you with the heart that doesn't show its face. & Jesus sucks the mud from your soul but the flame in my eye turned blue and cold & you risked your wrist to save my life & I should have kissed you that night but it's not right, oh no. Absence makes my heart empty, absence makes my heart empty, it makes me an egg without a yolk, you make me an egg without a yolk. Absence makes my heart hollow, absence makes my heart hollow, it makes me an egg without a yolk, you make me an egg without a yolk. I wasn't born when I was younger, I wasn't born when I was younger, but I was rebuilt when you spoke, I woke up when you spoke. They said, "There's always a reason to go, there's always a reason to stay; I know exactly why I'm going: I just can't stay." & I say, "I'll give you my whole summer if you open your fingers. I'd be lying if I said you ain't got nothing to do with me; it's your fault I'm like this, like this." You with the neck that holds my gaze, you with the tongue that speaks my name, you with the arms that keep me at a distance, you with the heart that doesn't show its face.

FLORENCE BERLIN

You are my grandfather's son and that's why I need you closer and inside I'm down and in some guts there are vultures. When they start wreaking havoc on your love, don't back down or run for cover. Don't feel bad, you must drown them or suffocate them. & I can't say if I believe hearts are learned. I can't tell if I care or if it matters. Maybe hearts are better off bitter, abused, dirty, vulgar. Maybe that's why broken loners last a little longer. But all I know, all I know is that I want to see you, I want to see you, see all these countries. Maybe I am my own mother and will always take care of my brother, but now you are my family too. How I loved you then and how I will love you and how I will.

BIRD BALLONE

I'm a ghost and you all know it. I sing songs and I don't slow down. It was a fragile thing and I dropped it. I picked up the pieces and put them in my pocket. And this time I won't try to win your heart. I've had space to think and I think I've gotten a little wiser. I'm looking for a new muse, you just made me tired. Call your bluff on the phone and dunk my blood. This is my loss of limbs, my loss of love. Call your bluff on the phone and dunk my blood. This is my loss of limbs, my loss of love. It was so cold you could see the two pairs of ribs almost bursting out of their skin to fly south, south until spring. Your hips swelled with confidence, you were naked like a newborn in the snow, but you wanted it, that's how you wanted it, and now your love is writing words on the wall with the pulp of a nectarine she picked earlier in the morning. in the orchard and you're on the street, a chest of drawers free while the parade of skeletons with bird balloons floats by. They fly back and forth. The streets can be strange, the streets can be dark. It's like leprosy landed on the moon and cast a nasty glow on the world and my room, it's like leprosy landed on the moon and cast a nasty glow on the world and my room, so how about it when I play the harp and you play that piano . Close the curtains and make nests like little sparrows. My limbs, my love are lost in you. My limbs, my love are yours. I remember that night in the forest on the hidden balance beam made out of a long wooden plank with a barrel underneath. We laid on both ends and after many tries and minutes of silence couldn't get it right until we did. & our breath caught. & we look up. & the stars were so still, the stars were so still. Both of our hearts were revealed. Our hearts have been revealed. and you were my friend you were my friend This is my loss of love, my loss of limbs, this is my loss of love, my loss of limbs. But now I'm a ghost and you all know it. I sing songs and I won't stop. My hair was growing so I cut it and when you looked away I put these trimmings in your locket haha.

ABOUT CLIMBING STAIRS

I can't think about this song while this song is playing and I never want to go back to Arkansas even if you're gone, even if you are. You treated me like a baby's skull and I rocked you like a newborn nightmare and I always wish I could go back there: straight down the hall and upstairs to that bed. I asked the deer if the hunter she heard crawl, crawl, crawl, crawl was coming. I whispered in her ear so sweetly and sincerely but she was already asleep and the floor she was lying on was red and sour and stained and I kissed her, kissed, kissed her before I turned around and I will never going back there: all the way to where it lay. We can close our eyes and scream into the darkness that there is still this light within us, that there is this struggle to find exactly where we belong. This chest is a ladder, climb up to my iris, you can live there, you know who I am. You know who I am. i am your apple So open the book and read me your favorite passage and know I'll be right here listening. I hear you and I've heard you for a thousand years.

YOU ARE THE APPLE

You loved making love to me on the plane; I've slept the length of the Atlantic. When I woke up we had landed. I've thought about it for days. If we had fallen into the sea. If we had perished at sea. If the mountain had held us captive in its jacket, well, God forbid, I'd be fine with that. 'Cause it would have saved me, it would have saved me, it would have saved me from the look you gave me when you left. Her lips so full I could cry. Her lips so full I could cry, cry, cry. Your eyes so closed I could hide in the closet, hide in the closet. My heart is so poor I could wait for your hands in my pockets. My heart is so broken I could beg for affection, beg for affection. I only have eyes for you; You are the apple, you are the apple. Alligators are here, they're under water, under water. You ate my heart, you ate my heart like strawberry shortcake at a birthday party, but I still need your love. I still need your love, I need your love. I still need your teeth around my organs, I still need your teeth around my organs. I still need your love 'cause you're the apple, you're the apple.

METZFLOOR

There's a ghost, a ghost on the mezzanine and she's drenched, drenched in some shiny bone, her bones and I babble about counting all her freckles to kissing her bare knuckles, the breath of bread as it bakes. How I suffer, I suffer deep inside, I wake up, I wake up with this fear inside me. How it does makes me ridiculous; with your knife while you pluck the seeds from my heart to plant in the soul to celebrate. You are sweet, sweet as a nectarine, when you speak, speak softly and gracefully; Oh, meeting you could be the death of my fear and the songs in my head would finally find their place and be sung.

YOUNGER BROTHER

I'm not sure how those marks got stuck in my heart; In his bed while I slept the devil had a fight. When I woke up I wished to god it was just a draw. Oh my god what a mess I would have been if I lost. Now I'm dreaming of the sky crashing down on me, liquid like an ocean. My little brother is here and I carry him around like a newborn baby. It seems like I always wind it up to escape raging beasts and storms. It's light behind my eyelids, heavy as a coin, but in daylight it's broad and older. Oh Lord, call me back, back to you. I will come. Seal my soul like an envelope, use your saliva, lick it shut. Bring your knives, use your tools, show your heart open. The water is boiling hot, so cold it burns. But if I put myself in your image, how you kill all my pain, all my pain.

RIFLE YOUR NECK

Less than a week after we met, I pressed my ear to her back and felt her heartbeat fall like raindrops into a bucket. I used to have a very beautiful spine but I forgot to give it a name so every time I tried to straighten it I couldn't get your attention and I put my palm on your collarbone wanting low fall asleep in your marrow. 🇧🇷 With the tenderness of a mouse rolled into a ball, with the tenderness of a mouse see you tomorrow. We stripped off all our clothes and that included all our jewelry and we ran back hand in hand as you brought out the beast in me, the parts that lie dormant I long to set them free and do in the light of this night I realize that I can easily sleep on my own. But there's a hunger beneath my skin and it's gripping my bones. There's a hunger like a lion's and it tugs at my bones. So I push my limbs forward like a tree in a storm and go to my kitchen and lean against the window, I'm as calm as a little lamb being led. I'm blue as blood before the blood turns red. & how it hurts even in the sun it's a joke how we can hurt even in the sun. Because a heart beats better in bed next to the one it loves. Yes, a heart beats better when death no longer plays a role in the head. 'Cause if you're dreaming about dying, then you're not really living, honey. You must starve, for this you must starve, and if you cry in the moon, you better lift your chin in the sun. Rotate your hips and straighten your neck. Rotate your hips and straighten your neck. Rotate your hips and straighten your neck. Rotate your hips and lean your body back. You gotta be hungry for it, you gotta be hungry for it, you gotta be hungry for it.

ROOF

If I'm the cop, then you're the thief. Let's play cowboys and indians in the backyard for slaughter. I dreamed that you would be on this roof. If you don't, that's fine, but if you do, well I guess it's destiny. If I'm the sap, you're the maple, and I'll stay close to you until I reach your table. On the mic, on the video projector, I almost yelled your name, but I held myself back, 'Cause there's another way I'll get you, if it's fate, if it's fate, if it's fate.

THE NOTHING PART II

Choose to use your heart, even if it's for the darkest fate that can be swallowed, a thing chewed up and misguided. So you can yearn in the gigantic nothingness of the night, left to your own devices and too exhausted to know what you want. I know, I know. And oh, organ donation is so excruciating: when you give it voluntarily, how ruthless a hand can be over you. & oh, the sour fear of defeat like wounded soldiers, all still and light as silk all roads to their marrow. and all the aches and pains, well, they've been through it with you so far and more, but when you feel it in your hip every time, how you wish you were home. Oh no we sing: Lay me down, lay me down, drop your crown, disarm me. Singing: Take me south, take me home, hold on and claim me. Claim me, yes, yes, yes. So we can yearn into the gigantic nothingness of the night left to its own devices, and we'll know, we'll know, we'll know exactly what we want. We'll know, we'll know, we'll know what we want.

TAXIDERMIST, TAXIDERMIST

Repression, persistent conviction. ligaments and bones. ligaments and bones. Crystal Structures, Defects and Errors. Once I turn all my mineral to stone, stone. & so I introduce myself again. "How are you?" I say, "I've heard such beautiful things about who you are and where you've been, but be back in me, back in me." Will-will-oh desert, my dark and ambiguous desert, will you wrap me up? Lie-oh-lie-oh lioness, my lioness, sharp and ambivalent, won't you lie in my skin? Taxi taxidermist, taxidermist, soaked intentionist, I'm determined to regain steady hand on my own broken compass. Semantic saturation where I can say your name over and over again until it means nothing. A willful erasure of everything I know I should never have known about you. But you're a deer with so many secrets and I savored and savored your gentleness, I bled to death down to your arms and wanted to bite your neck, caress you. My love, my sweet love that I haven't parted with yet: lay on my wrist one night, touch my heartbeat on your collarbone. One day we'll be ecstatic, sweet ecstasy. How expectant and how masterful: for you to show me that I am high and true here in this world. Knowing myself before I know you.